A Tory Haiku

6 Apr

I noticed this morning that CBC Radio’s Metro Morning program is running a contest for haikus based on any electoral theme. Since I have been suffering from my own, rather unusual, election issue, I’ve decided to write one. And here’s the context.

The Stephen Harper government, or the Conservative Party, or whatever they want to call themselves, has been filling my inbox for the past several days with press releases I have no interest in reading or even knowing about. They were doing this for a while a couple of years ago, until – after clicking on ‘unsubscribe’ a few times to no avail – I actually had to phone someone in Ottawa, where a clearly offended young woman haughtily agreed to stop it.

But now that elections are coming up, they’ve decided to subject me once again to these irritating reminders of themselves, and not just one every now and then, but four or five every day. The fact that I am actually paying them to be irritated by them (as if they didn’t already irritate me enough) really doesn’t help.

So here is my haiku — difficult as it is to reduce the annoyance factor to such a restrictive number of syllables.* 

News of Harper fills

My inbox; his tsunami

Of self-promotion.

*And similar to the whole electoral process, reducing our opinions, concerns and needs into a simple  mark on a piece of paper.

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